Sending money after someone dies?

I just found out that one of my dad's friends who I'd known since birth died today. We live halfway across the country from them and I want to send them something. My husband is Chinese and in Chinese culture, you send money for deaths -- to help with funeral arrangements and such. I think this is much more practical than sending flowers or something and would like to send a card with some money but is there any way that the family might take offense to my sending money instead of something like flowers or food?

Sending money after someone dies?
Preggo not at all. If you sent a nice card and wrote in the card that part of your husbands Chinese heritage calls for the giving of money upon the death of a loved one that you would like to do that. Say that you are aware that they more than likely don't need any help with funeral expenses but that to honor your hubbys culture, in this the year of the Rat, you have chosen to do that. Please accept this small token as our sincere and heartfelt condolences on the passing of their father, grandfather, husband. Love Preggo and Hubby.
Reply:yes they may! it's making out that they are poor. i'm sure the guy had savings to pay for his own funeral.
Reply:The best way for you to handle this is to send a check in a card, write that this money can be used in any way the family wishes, or can be given to a favorite charity in his honor...keep it very short and to the point, also include a favorite memory you have of your dads friend.
Reply:I have experienced someone sending money to me when a realtive died and since the funeral was covered, I gave all the contributions to a soup kitchen in that person's name.
Reply:A card of condolence would do
Reply:When my father passed away we received many cards with money in them. Since the funeral expenses were already covered we used some of the money for his tombstone and part of the money went to the cancer foundation. Many people send money and I have never heard of anybody taking offense.
Reply:I disagree, not everybody have their funeral plan. My brother in law pass away last week. He was only 32. He was diagnose with Pancreatic cancer a year ago. Well when he was unable to preform on his job the lay him off. He lost his insurance so my sister had to sign a letter that she was responsible for the bill. In one yr, which is how long he lived after he was diagnose, they lost everything, their house, cars, and all of their savings. My sister had no money left for the funeral Thank God there were alot of people who were willing to help by giving her money. So I would send them money.
Reply:My family is Italian and we do this also. I can tell you that from my own personal experience, not all people do this. In your circumstance, I would think it would be totally acceptable and the family would understand and accept your condolences. I had an instance a few years back where one of my cousins wife's mom passed away so I went to the veiwing/funeral. Afterwards, my family and hers all met up at my cousin and her home. My side of the family brought home cooked meals to the home so they wouldn't have to worry about cooking. She was not raised Catholic/Italian like we were so she didn't understand our traditions following the funeral. This is common in my family and something we've always done. She found it odd. Later on that week when she received my mass card in the mail with a personalized check she was very baffled and called me again to question it as I wasn't the only one in my family that sent her money. I had to laugh because she asked me why people were paying her for her mothers passing. She was not upset or insulted, she just didnt understand.



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