What can one do for parents whose child has passed away?

We are bringing meals in, but what else can we do? And what type of flowers would be nice for the funeral? The little girl was 5 and has been sick since birth. There are older children. What can we do for them?

What can one do for parents whose child has passed away?
Pray. Pray for them, and with them. Talk with them about her. Listen, don%26#039;t change the subject, don%26#039;t avoid the topic. And keep it up after the funeral and the flowers and the food are gone. For the older kids, ask them about themselves, do they want to go for a bike ride or to the park? Maybe play some video games. Listen to them too. Let them talk or let them sit. Sunflowers are nice,or maybe something pink when it comes to flowers. Try not to say I%26#039;m sorry or she is in a better place to much. Hugs can be better than words right now. It is very hard when someone so young dies. But, now you can minister to them with your friendship, and love. We don%26#039;t have the answers to everything, not even in this age of technology and advancement, and as hard as that is, we have to accept that. Or deny it and stop loving, laughing, living.
Reply:Not much more than ur now doing, just let them know u r there for them in any way possible. U might volunteer later to take the older children to their activities, so as to give the parents a chance to grieve in private. As for the flowers, explain to the florist that they r for a child, they will know how to make up an appropriate arrangement. Later u could invite the entire family to ur house for dinner, just to have a change in atmosphere. Bless u for being so caring.
Reply:you r very sweet


be kind do what u r doing


let them greive


be you you seem very kind
Reply:The best thing you can do is continue to support them. Be a good listener and don%26#039;t just abandon them after the funeral is over. Many people quit socializing with someone who has lost a loved one after the funeral because they don%26#039;t know how to talk to them. I saw one really neat memorial at a funeral in leui of flowers. It was the deceased little girls face made out of tiny pictures of flowers. They had it on display and it was beautiful. Try a local photo shop.
Reply:The best thing you can do, is to just be there for them, what you are doing for them, believe me will never be forgotten, My brother lost his son at the age of twenty due to a freak accident, and just being there for him and his wife was enough, I did not have the means to help them financially, but just being a shoulder to cry on is enough, and to talk to. It is not easy losing a child, I would not give them flowers, I would help them financially is they need it, believe me it counts for a lot, and at a time like this financial aid is greatly appreciated. Carry on being the friend you are to them, God Bless You
Reply:Meals are a great idea. I also suggest stopping by often to check on the family in the next several months. They will be in mourning for a long time and will need support beyond just the time of the funeral.


As for flowers, I%26#039;d suggest something pink and white for a little girl, or call the florist the family is using and ask for a recommendation on flowers that will coordinate.
Reply:There is little to do in this sad case.... only a long period of time and good friends such as yourself can help. Flowers that the child may have known (eg from the home or a park) might be more meaningful, however pretty flowers to pay respect to a pretty child will do.. no matter what the name or colour.





Maybe you could help out by taking the older children out for the day / weekend, in order to keep the parents some alone time... or they may want the family together to deal with it together.





Just keep doing what your doing... being there for them. There isnt a script for it... its pretty much well adlib.





Dont forget to be there for the kids... as sometimes they dont know how to talk to the parents / siblings as they dont want to further others pain and misery... they need to know someone is there to listen if need be.
Reply:, Know that they must be allowed to grieve, to cry.





So often people try to stem the tears and all the grief stays bottled up.


For young people it often helps if they draw pictures or write letters for the sibling who has died.


As for flowers, this time of year miniature tulips and daffodils, snowdrops are beautiful and simple...





May the family find some kind of peace and comfort with friends, family and each other.


I am sorry that the family had to see their child ill, and then die, it is surely the hardest thing to bear...





Cassandra
Reply:Hugs and listen to them. Tell them you are there for them. Best to let them talk. If you hug them and say nothing silence is uncomfortable so after awhile they will talk. There is nothing you can say at this time. You are a good friend good luck
Reply:There is really nothing one can do for a parent grieving for a child except be there for them, the way you are. It is one of the most unnatural deaths, child before the parent, and hard on everyone. Let them know you feel for them, are willing to help out in anyway you can, and then let them get on with their grieving on their own terms. Bless you for being so caring.
Reply:What a wonderful question.


Maybe at the funeral is to hand each of the older children a rose or something. Let them know that they are remembered.


Baby white roses would be sweet for the one lost.


Important thing is that eventually the family will eventually get less attention. that is why ocassionally be willing to talk abut the child if the mother wants to talk.





I lost an adult child. and I want him remembered.
Reply:Listen to them. Sit quietly and let them speak into the silence. Don%26#039;t be shocked by anger and fear... it is natural. Reassure that whatever family members are feeling is okay and natural. All that YOU can say is that you%26#039;re sorry. Take the other children out for an afternoon...to the Zoo or a movie. They may feel guilt over their relief from the illness of their sibling...and there may be ODD behaviors. Ride with it. They ARE going to have angry feelings and it will show up. Let them know that you care by providing ACTIVITIES that provide pleasant memories of this time in their lives. Flowers? Well...florists have good plans for all these concerns. Bless you for caring! Hugs, Gina C.



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