Monday, August 3, 2009

Christmas card from MOM?

Dear Darling Son and That Person You Married,





Merry Christmas to you, and please don't worry. I'm just fine considering I can't breathe or eat. The important thing is that you have a nice holiday, thousands of miles away from your ailing mother. I've sent along my last ten dollars in this card, which I hope you'll spend on my grandchildren. God knows their mother never buys them anything nice. They look so thin in their pictures, poor babies.





Thank you so much for the Christmas flowers, dear boy. I put them in the freezer so they'll stay fresh for my grave. Which reminds me -- we buried Grandma last week. I know she died years ago, but I got to yearning for a good funeral so Aunt Viola and I dug her up and had the services all over again. I would have invited you, but I know that woman you live with would have never let you come. I bet she's never even watched that videotape of my hemorrhoid surgery, has she?





Well son, it's time for me to crawl off to bed now. I lost my cane beating off muggers last week, but don't you worry about me. I'm also getting used to the cold since they turned my heat off and am grateful because the frost on my bed numbs the constant pain. Now don't you even think about sending any more money, because I know you need it for those expensive family vacations you take every year. Give my love to my darling grandbabies and my regards to whatever-her- name-is -- the one with the black roots who stole you screaming from my bosom.





Merry Christmas.





Love, Mom

Christmas card from MOM?
Hahaha how did you get the letter my hubbys mom sent us last Christmas? pmsl this made me choke on my coffee ,thx for the laugh...keep it up....star!
Reply:hahahahaaa good'un ...lol
Reply:ya, it is! lol, did she really send u that?... probably not. oh well, ill giv u a star!
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Reply:never too early for that. it was really funny.
Reply:I'm just hoping my mother doesn't see that
Reply:may the lord bless all little children, and may the lord bless mine with compassion, and not what that poor mum has to suffer. AMEN


LOL
Reply:lol! merry christmas!
Reply:nice
Reply:LOL
Reply:its what the start of october and we got xmas jokes already
Reply:mother?


is it really you?





i know women like this (my mates mum for one)
Reply:...........................................
Reply:Just what every mother thinks of her married son!
Reply:lol
Reply:lol very gd!
Reply:lol
Reply:You might as well have an early Christmas joke...some of the stores already have stuff out....lol..have a star
Reply:awww what a precious mother......lol...
Reply:Hahahhahahahaaaaaa, and it was funny too babes
Reply:hahahaha... that is really funny! u get a star
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skin disease

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